well this was my first backpackers style kinda trip so i was pretty excited about it.
i went with james and his sister yilin. She had all the contacts in ho chi minh city so we managed to secure a room with 4 beds at this small motel like place, ok motel is wrong, its more like a hostel.

the room wasnt so bad, first impression - quite neat, clean sheets, clean pillows, couches, nice toilet with basic facilities ( cept hot water), a tv ( cable inclu.) and an air con! pretty good for 3 USD a night.
yeah " a night " that was when it started to feel like we were really roughing it out on this trip! - after a day activities prodding through Ben Thanh Market , all sweaty and stuff..the room all of a sudden was just like the market- all stuffy..still air even after opening the windows...it was crazy. sweating like a fucking dog there. There was this stale smell to the entire place but thats small issue i guess cause no one else mentioned. Finally shower time, it went smoothly until the water got clogged on the floor, thankfully for me their was a small broom which i used to unclog the hole on the ground, and there was like a fucking big ball of hair! pubic hair and long girls hair to be exact haha. sick. u know once out of a shower u're supposed to feel all cool like the greatest feeling of ur life besides an orgasm...well once i got out, in record time like 20 seconds i was all sweating again! i think its due to the intense change of temperature the body was experiencing and the sweating carried on through the night..drip drip drip. okay thats just me exaggerating. but its was sticky feeling when u tossed and turned.
one of the nights i got bitten by a fucking roach at the back of my neck, but at that time i was too sleepy maybe i thought it was a dream, but james claimed he heard me cussing and swearing that night. damn roach. cause i feel hours later at ard 4am i woke up and just happen to run my hand thru my hair and i felt some damn roach in it! i just flung it off and went back to sleep. every since that moment i just got roach phobia or something. every time i woke up i scanned and made sure no stupid critter was on the bed.

i just got a msn message from james that he's collecting his pink i/c tom morning.

hi guys.
i am bored online and was reading morhor's blog and its damn hilarious. you should check it out www.morhor.blogspot.com.
the reason why i am bored like all the boys from this batch all clearing leave to ord, same as me.
geesh its only been afew days and i am like dying what about the months to august b4 school begins.
well i got quite a couple of things planned
1. confirmed a vietnam trip with jamesy and his sister to visit uncle ho chi minh (april)
    - hey its a good deal man. 150 bucks for tickets 2 way, then jamesy says we'll stay at some
       backpackers style place under 3 USD a night, this is gonna be fun.
2. might be going to the states to visit my uncle ( my real uncle), in NYC but this one;s not
    confirmed, tickets not easy to get on free mileage. see how.
3.  going to china, beijing to spend some time with my dad and maybe throw in a one month chinese    
     improvement course since my parents claim my mandarin would put us chinese to shame but i tell 
      you my mandarin has improved drastically in the army! u can add a couple of jay chou songs to it!

well i just got a call from my camp saying i have to go back on friday to do some standard obstacle course, wtf! i am ord-ing next wed and they want me back. this is lame.
so what if i dont do it, on the 24th they would tell me "sollie ah u haven do SOC u cannot ord."
sigh lame-o and plus my legs abit sore from this morning;s thrashing of 6 div. the match with 6 div, was damn rowdy more like a boxing match but nevertheless we won so i dont care.
so how;s everybody?
i can officially say i am an online shopper! my track record : 6 online ebay buys and a number of other website purchases. most pple think its too much of a hassle to bid and stuff but once you learn it its pretty easy and quite addictive just browsing thru the millions of products on sale!
just go give it a try, if you dont know how you can email me i can help you!
poh.

i got to move on with my life. i feel like i am just stuck here in some trench i cant get out.
actually i can get out but i am letting lil indecisive thoughts hold me down.
i am getting bothered by the smallest of things.
sometimes i ask myself is it worth the wait? i never waited for anyone, but why am i now?
do i want it or not.
think think.
fuck. i dont know.
something i will regret?

yesterday i re-introduced myself to the true meaning of being dirty or bedraggled,black,contaminated,cruddy,crummy okay whatever you want to call it.
this blog would definitely disguest most pple but really it was only yesterday so dont worry its not my usual habit.
its been awhile since i have not bathed in consecutives days, wait b4 you jump to any conclusion that lionel poh is a sick dirty swine or something, the previous times that i did this stun was due to my army missions which didnt permit me to take a shower for 5 days or even brush my teeth.
and i rediscovered the feeling of dirt and sweat all in one just yesterday, it started off when i woke up in the morning and didnt want to brush my teeth b4 breakfast.
i felt that it was pointless to brush my teeth b4 breakfast i mean why brush when you are gonna have breakfast with more food, germs and stuff again back in your mouth. so i convinced my sleepy self that maybe i would brush after breakfast. and as expected, i forgot okay i was lazy when i got back from breakfast so i didnt brush at all. then the day continued, i was in camp by the way and so thru out the day, more sweat piled up then in the evening i had a rugby match. though i played only one half of the match, at the end of it i was soaked in sweat, bits of mud and grass all over, maybe someone elses blood from a wound, then again i didnt take a shower cause i was in a rush to head back t camp so the least i did was just took some water and clensed the dirt off my hands and legs.
there was still bits of grass and mud hanging on my neck, stuck in my ear and def down in my pants.

when i got back to camp, i was too tired to do anything it was close to 11 and i had to wake up at 3 am so did the neccessary preps and prepared to sleep. while all this was going on i think i was developing a rash over my back and groin area which kept me awake for some time haha. and i didnt have my tooth brush and paste with me in my camp so i thought i give it a miss. could feel small minute particles of sand still in my ear. grass bits up my. then i went to sleep soundly.
more discomfort struck when i woke up, you know when you wake up you always get this sick feeling your mouth mine felt like there was a hugh layer of germs formed up infront of my teeth and i used my finger to swipe my 2 front teeth and to my amazement i scrapped off some pale whitish creamy substance. maybe it was dinner.
and the finale, i had a 21 km run to complete....so couple the day b4 's activities and all the sweat and dirt culminated up during the run...you can imagine how good the bath felt. when i got home.
damn still got a slick itch all over my back.
but rest assure folks that this is a one off event! promise you that!
and the stuff that james said that i always just head to bed after my rugby trainings it only happened a few times! say like 10 times in my life!
so relax.
old dirty bastard.

hello whoever ever reads my blog, but just hello.
today well i am heading back to camp tonight, fucking depressing first time in half a yr i am booking
back in on a sunday nite cause ill be on course for the next 2 weeks. yes i know, i promised not to talk about camp/army/green in my last blog, so dont worry this blog is not about it.

its about the guy at my gym, no he's not gay. hes this big indian guy who's like the head instructor over there and hes keep bugging everyone while everyones busy doing their exercise!
i have to admit i will never reach his 18 inch biceps, massive chest which protrudes out incredibly when he puts on his shirt or his lengthy wing span, i mean whenever hes in the gym and i am working out he always without fails will come to me and correct my techniques or give me newer techniques which he claims are better.

okay maybe if he did like coach me once or twice but not like every fucking exercise that i do, when i glance at the mirror and see him walking towards me, i feel like oh shit hes coming like i am some lousy trainee doing some wrong and hes gonna fuck me like ' hold the weights closer!, higher! your grip ! its wrong!'
it gets damn irritating and he does it to every guy down there man . i once saw him pissed this ang mo off, this ang mo, i seen him regularly at the gym and i noticed his exercies and techniques hes one of those really serious about keeping lean and fit even has a folder to jot down his reps and sets.until that night when the big guy stepped in and corrected every single exercise he was doing, and i knew the ang mo was pissed and have not seen him since.
and also its probably the way he says it and demostrates it, say for example a simple bicep curl he would elaborate it in full detail which telling me to keep looking at the way his muscle contract and expand as if showing it off to me. damn i always feel demoralised man fuck how did his biceps get so big.
guess probably when you get bigger, your ego too gets bigger and you want to show it off or something. guys are like this. thankfully he wasnt there today could work out in peace.
 

hello. just quite glad with myself these 2 days that i actually managed to get my ass
out of my house to meet up with some pple. realised that i have been hibernating too long at home and slowly  becoming a recluse, living it out at home in seclusion or some sort of solititude.

today was my first day back in camp after a long break, say like almost a week? man i hate to say it and others would be disgusted if they heard me, but it was good for once to put on the green uniform just for a day.

maybe the only boring and torturing part was waking up at 6am cause i had to head to another camp to do some fatigue work. but nevertheless, the rest of the day was great. i was just sitting there in the tonner with just 6 of us on the way to our destination and it struck me, damn as long as you are in the army, you dont have to plan what to do for your day unlike outside. i mean on a normal training day for me i would have to plan things like what time to leave home, what bus and train to take, should i head home b4 my next training? where would lunch be ? you know all those daily routine life pattern questions. yeah contrast that to the army where you got those high ranking bigger fucks who already planned your day weeks b4 and they are also kind enough to even put it into lil time slots so you dont have to worry about what time to be there. and it gets even better, they even kindly sponsored for you a vehicle for you to travel about and its free! damn. what a life.

okay though meals are also in the package, but thats one of the down side of it, the meals are barely edible. thankfully there s a canteen and mess around to feed us all. and when during the day, it starts to rain, everythings put on hold for the period or even gets canceled and you just can just head to the bunk and sleep ( provided you dont get caught which is highly unlikely cause most of the superiors are either sleeping themselves, drinking beer at the mess or maybe at geylang or something.)

so after you slumber for like a few hours, they come and tell you, you can go back now, see thats it for the day. so simple. its just amazing how life in the army operates, totally oblivious of the real world.its like an imaginary world yet its real.

but yeah hope you guys realised that i am only talking about today and that the truth is life in there is alot more complicated. but i am glad i had a good time back there and hope for more rainy days.okay after this blog, i will try not to talk about the army again

hello, not sure why i got so much time these days to start blogging again.

yeah today was my grandmothers funeral and it was held at some mandai columbrium ( hope thats how you spell it)

it was definitely some new place and i must say i was quite amazed by the technology displayed all around. there were electronic signboards all around, outside the halls displaying the names of the late, which you go into to pay your final respects.the viewing rooms all...very well built.

and when you are done, you are ushered to some waiting lounge with seats and all so you can sit down and cry or just wait for the chartered buses to take you back, just like an airport terminal.

these few days its been really emotional for me. ha the most emotional i have been in a long long time.and it wasnt caused by the demise of my granny. someone else but its okay i deserved it. and i learnt.

been a while since i have been here. hows everything.good nice to know that. well i am writing this to let someone out there know that i am sorry for what i have done in the past. i told you, i got alot of things to pour out and you really opened up my eyes last night with those knife stabbing messages. if i you felt that i kept you like a "little dirty secret" or a "mistress" i am terribly sorry. i explained to you why but i guess no matter how much i try to reason, the wound would not close up so easily just like how easily i kept it on the low.i didnt have much choice and things happened really fast.

and how i got together with j after i broke off with you, it was just that after we ended, we did avoid each other or maybe i did, and that gap really caused the fire to die. and during that period of time or before that, we never really contacted each other, never called, maybe once or twice dropped a message but it never really triggered anything big enough to rekindle the flames.

but after thinking about it through i guess i dont deserve this second chance. yeah you should have told me to f off long ago and i felt i should have and not linger around and have anything to do with your life. and i guess i will leave it as how you would like it. just really disappointed at the way you judged me unfairly, its the reason why i felt thats the last straw for you and me. i dont blame you , seemed like i hurt you alot  in the past and know its just pay back time, but theres a limit that all this paying back should stop at.

guess thats enough.